these days i seem to think alot

but i never seem to have enough time.
i need to get my letter of recommendation in as well as my transcripts.

everything is moving so fast. i need to catch hold of something before it all flies away.










this definitely made my night :) haha

oh boy.

i applied. i, alyssa fayman jensen, applied for college. i'm freaking out. what if the fact that i hate high school and that i do as little as possible in said high school completely ruins my chance of EVER GETTING OUT?

i don't know what i'll do if i don't get in.



oh boy.

no pictures tonight. i need to sleep.

i've been sick for three days and in that three days i've done nothing but sleep, watch pointless t.v. and think about anything and everything. so between cold sweats and heat flashes, i've come to the conclusion that it will take more than just a low blow to the heart to stop me. i may still be heart broken and strung up on the boy who let me go, but so what? that's not going to stop me from being who i want to be. it's been three years and nothings changed. so maybe i should just embrace it and take my pain as a blessing and change for the better, instead of expecting the worse.

5ive things friday!

1) interesting interior design





2) connor oberst









3) postsecret










4) BREAKFAST









5)sushi

stop crying to the ocean, stop crying over me.

Stop worrying over nothing, stop worrying over me.

oh how i wish i could.

i have so much homework to do and i am le tired. so tired in fact that i could fall asleep right now and sleep til tomorrow. i'll just keep chanting "only a couple more hours" to myself over and over and over again.

so, i'm writing a paper on the definition of the word love and i'm nostalgically using an example from my own life. what are you experience with love? i'd really LOVE to know.

and then i'm going to re-edit my college application essay. this is so stressful. i over analyze my writing and i rewrite everything numerous times, just trying to get it right. i'm giving myself a deadline. i have to submit it by monday. otherwise i'll never do it. i just hope its good enough.




i wish i had this.



and this.



this is how i will remember you.



So it's been so long since you said,
"Well I know what I want and what I want's right here with you."

i know, i know. i'm really trying.

Burning every bridge that I cross to find some beautiful place to get lost

i honestly can't believe that its only 2nd quarter. i don't know how i'm going to make it out of here. i just want to graduate already. i want to be able to be my own person with out the constraints and binds of someone else. and to be completely honest, i won't miss 95% of this town.

i have a heart of blue skies and open roads that's being constricted by the cage of a small town. someday, i'm going to move to a big city in europe and i'm going have a little apartment in the heart of the city. i'm going to write about everything i see and i'm going to take millions of photos. and i'm going to meet a man who will think that i am the one.
"what is your name?" he will say. and i will answer him with my new name. i will rid myself of the girl i used to be and the new me will be brash, beautiful and above all, fearless. "you speak the language beautifully." he will compliment me. i will tell him that i taught myself and that i have a knack for languages. we will fall in love and see the world together. and i will forget all about you and all the ways i loved you. i will forget the way you made me feel and the how you walked away.
one day i will be entirely happy. but for one second i will think of you again. and in that second all the pain, happiness, joy and fear you have shown me will all return and i will become the same little girl i was.


"I just hope one day you see me. And when you do, your heart stops"

















rings rings rings. i love rings.











the PERFECT breakfast.

oh well. that's all for today.
i'm going to watch sons of anarchy and pretend that my life is more exciting than it really is.

a real short post...

...because i have school work to do. 4-5 minute speech that i haven't started yet...yikes! D: oh well. i'll just write some mambo jambo bullshit and hopefully it will turn out.

i have a new name, because my eyes are green and the song Green Eyed Lady by Sugarloaf was stuck in my head. and then epiphany hit me. :) oh me oh my.










i can not wait to have a new room to decorate. scratch that. i can not wait to move out! i can't wait to go to college. i can't wait to restart and jumpstart my life. i can't wait to be able to start new.



“You have four years to be irresponsible here. Relax. Work is for people with jobs. You’ll never remember class time, but you’ll remember time you wasted hanging out with your friends. So, stay out late. Go out on a Tuesday with your friends when you have a paper due Wednesday. Spend money you don’t have. Drink ’til sunrise. The work never ends, but college does…” -Tom Petty

i still have so long to wait...

i'm going to miss the gentle autum breeze.

so i worked only for tips last night. wooh. oh well. at least i'm 37 dollars richer than i was before right?
unfortunately on my way back to the car i slipped on the curve and it felt like i dislocated my knee. ugh. i think this is the 4th time i've done this. :( oh well.


now for pretty things that make me smile!
:)

the PERFECT treehouse wedding!

ahhhh! it's so beautiful!! when i get married, i want it to be just like this. everything, down to the polaroids of the couple hanging on a clothes line and the flowers on the groomsmen made out of ribbon, is just perfect.







nanananananaBATMAN.




i <3 this movie SO much.




















i CANNOT wait for the new alice in wonderland to come out! i am seriously SO excited!

:D


i wish someone would surprise me with a dinner date just like this one. its so cute and romantic. *squeal*

i can't wait for thanksgiving!

i just can't wait! turkey, mashed potatoes, stuffing (or maybe its dressing. it is incredibly necessary for you to know the difference.), cranberry sauce.

its all just wonderful.


aaaand
i wish i had red hair. six more months, six more months...